April 14, 2011

My 30th Birthday


I’ve been meaning to write this post for a long time, since spring came, but I’ve been so lost in work and various other stuff that I just couldn’t bring myself to write! Spring! The season of pure beauty and joy, my season, my birthday season. That’s right! I’m a spring child, born in March; I’ve always felt a special affinity to this time of the year. As soon as winter gives way to fresh sunshine and the light south winds begins to blow, I can smell a promising newness.


I’ve always been very enthusiastic and even a little vain at times about my birthdays. I hear that this is juvenile and as soon as you step into adulthood, you are not supposed to cry out loud about your own birthday! But alas! I’m yet to understand adulthood and I find no reason to not celebrate my birthday and in some way the arrival of spring and the turning of the wheel of seasons. So, in many ways, my birthday is almost a metaphor of rebirth and renewal in every sphere of my life.

This year’s birthday was a very special one for me, as I turned 30. 30! I still cannot believe I’m that old and yet I feel I’ve a long way to go in order to achieve true adulthood, maybe I never will! But no matter, no matter, it’s an important number and a landmark year in the life of any girl and another reason to have an extra special birthday party. Being a girl is fun but it is also difficult. And being older makes it worse. But it’s all in your head. I don’t see any reason why I should suddenly change everything about myself in order to fit into a stereotype. So, I promised myself to do what my heart desires and make myself believe that I’m special enough to allow myself all the attention in the world. But how am I going to do that without the help of my family and friends? In an ideal world, everyone should have tried to work extra hard to please me (I am narcissistic), but in this case, I’ll have to try extra hard in order to convince the others to please me for one day, PLEASE?


I’ve been asking my husband for days to please please plan a surprise something for me on my birthday. He is not very good with these things but I begged him to please try this once since I won’t be turning 30 again anytime soon. So he said he’ll try and I hoped in my heart and in my mind that he doesn’t forget. Apart from that, I also didn’t want to miss out on the regular birthday party at home that I have each year with a group of close knit people. As for me, I was also preparing in my own way to turn 30 and making plans, planning my birthday outfit etc. I also sew my very own clutch bag for myself and a pair of fascinators, one for my sister and one for me. Me and my sister are partners in crime when it comes to birthdays. We never miss out on each others’ birthdays. We share the same sentiments when it comes to that. So we were planning over the phone about stuff to do for my 30th birthday. We planned our wardrobe together and decided to wear fascinators come what may!

It was her idea to bring in my birthday the night before by going out partying with friends. I told my husband the plan and he agreed. But what I didn’t know was he and my sister and secretly planned for the surprise on the eve of my birthday. We had decided to call on two very special friends for this occasion. All the others were invited to my regular birthday party at home the next evening. We had made a guest list and invited everyone and planned for food and beverages in advance.




As the day drew near, I got all excited and happy at the prospect of an extended two day birthday celebration that I never had before. At times I felt I was trying too hard, but I told myself, I better because it was important for me and if that makes me a…. it doesn’t matter!

On the morning of the bringing-in-birthday-party, I woke up feeling that familiar happy feeling that I get once every year, but this year I’ll be getting that twice, two days in a row! I spent all morning pampering myself, manicures and facials and all kinds of girly stuff. I still had no idea of what the surprise was going to be so that was fun! Late evening, we dressed up and waited for our friends to pick us up. I was wearing a A-line white twenties dress with a hot pink colored shrug paired with golden gladiator sandals that I had bought for myself, golden studs for my ears and the white and pink rosette fascinator


We went to a pub and drank and danced and got high. But as soon as the clock struck twelve, Cinderella was transformed into a retard looking fairy! You must be wondering what I’m talking about. This is what happened. The DJ suddenly stopped the music and wished me happy birthday followed by the happy birthday song and from nowhere my sister attached a tiny white pair of fairy wings on my shoulders and my friends put a stupid looking hair band on my head with stars poking out on springs and someone handed me a magic wand. I was surprised, I must say, such stuff has never happened to me when I was a kid, I always had very tame and mellow parties, not even birthday bumps! And now, when I’m 30, I get to be a kid! I found a chocolate cake waiting on the bar counter with the numbers 13 on it. The barman set the bar counter on fire with the help of all their liquid stuff. I blew out the candles and cut my birthday cake. Then a bottle of champagne appeared and we were poured sparkling bubbly in elegant looking glasses. A feeling of warmth and gladness filled me and for the first time I felt thankful for being blessed with great friends and family! It’s true that I had asked for a surprise in the first place but to think that my loved ones had actually planned this for me, just to make me feel important and loved is a great feeling and I confess that I have not felt this very many times in my life.


After ushering in my birthday in the greatest way possible and with the perfect set of people, we headed back home where I found a particularly special bottle of whiskey that my husband was saving for a long time standing on the table and the five glasses along with it. He had also tied a big red bow on the neck of the bottle. We opened the whiskey and drank some more into the night. The white fairy wings and the magic wand was now hanging from the back of the chair and I had also received some gifts (my favorite part!). My sister knows my obsession with packing gifts and that I always insist that a gift should look like a gift, it doesn’t matter what is inside. She had painstakingly wrapped each one in pretty paper and then put the little packages in a small basket. Just looking at it gives me pleasure, I wish I never had to open my gifts, that I could keep them that way forever and look at them once in a while and wonder what’s inside. As for this one, she had wrapped all kinds of odds and ends together, a chocolate, a plastic toy, paper flowers, fridge magnet, a pretty handmade diary etc. I had also got a beautiful pair of antique silver earrings from my friend. And my husband had given me a truckload of amazing looking crafting paper!


We drank very late into the night until everyone said goodbye. I went to sleep feeling happy and content and wished I could feel like this every day of my life. And I suddenly remembered that on the other side of the night was my actual birthday; this was just the run up!

Next morning we spent a lazy and happy morning with my family. We prepared for the evening festivities to commence. We had yummy lunch cooked by my mum. And we even snoozed a bit in the afternoon. It was perfect. In the evening, the festive feeling came back as one by one my guests arrived dressed in their best. I was wearing a black tunic and tights with long Tibetan earrings today, the Cinderella phase was over, I was back to being my ethnic, half-wiccan, woman-wants-to-be-child self!

The evening party was familiar and predictable and in its own way reassuring, that some things never change and thank god for that! Late at night when everyone had left, I started opening presents which were by now piled on my dresser and as usual looked pretty and inviting. I had received quite a number of earrings, as usual, since I’m a jewelry freak and everyone knows that so it’s quite easy to give me a gift! I also received a book from my parents, Jawaharlal Nehru’s letters to Indira which is a book everyone should read, it’s about world history (I love history). Among other things, I also got a electric egg beater from my aunt, thank you!


It had been a birthday of my dreams; I couldn’t imagine a better way to turn 30 and yet to feel younger and sprightier than ever! Till very recently I had never considered what I already have, and had always pined for things which were not there. But the greatest gift that I got on my 30th birthday was that of wisdom and understanding. To have a loving family is the greatest gift of all and to know that there are friends who’ll love you unconditionally and this simple fact suddenly dawned on me that night and the way in which I look at life has changed ever since. Ever since that night, I have truly been reborn. This spring has been the most fruitful and by turning 30 I haven’t got any older, I have got better.

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